


Colors of You

by foxesjosten



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Baltimore, Canon Compliant, Character Death, M/M, Soulmates, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-02
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-23 21:44:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16167503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foxesjosten/pseuds/foxesjosten
Summary: Neil first sees the world in color when he's looking up at the boy who smacked him with an exy stick. That same boy sees color for the first time as he's taking a swing at Neil. If both of them ignore this obvious mistake, then it isn't real. The universe would eventually fix its mistake. What Andrew can't ignore is the world reverting to black and white when Neil goes missing. And there's only one reason Andrew would lose his colors, but that's another thing that can't be real, right?





	Colors of You

**Author's Note:**

> Song of the fic:   
> Colors by Day6

The first time Neil Josten saw the world in color was breathtaking, literally. One minute he was running from a future he couldn’t let himself have and the next, he found himself on the locker room floor gasping in pain. Neil opened his eyes again when he regained the ability to breathe, but within seconds he was losing his breath all over again. It wasn’t his assailant that rendered him breathless this time. This time it was the world around him that stole the air from his lungs. Or rather how he was seeing the world around him. Neil’s once black and white world came into screaming color and he knew exactly what that meant. 

Andrew Minyard did not have a soulmate, or at least that’s what he told himself. He did not hope to one day see the world differently because he simply did not hope for anything. Hope was dangerous. Hope could distract you for a matter of seconds and manage to ruin everything. So when Andrew’s world burst into color right before his very eyes, his first instinct was to lash out. His first instinct was to hit something. In this case, what he hit was someone. That someone was the reason for his life changing in one of the worst possible ways, so he felt no pity for the pain he caused the boy on the floor. If Andrew cared enough to defend himself, which he never would, he would have said that everything happened too fast. Overwhelmingly fast. The locker room door slammed open and when he looked up at who they had traveled to Millport for, his whole world changed. And he knew exactly what that meant. 

The universe had played many cruel jokes on both Andrew and Neil throughout their lives, and this particular joke, like all of the others, had no humor involved. There was nothing funny about this mistake. And that’s exactly what both of them considered this, a huge mistake. The universe made mistakes all the time and this had to be one of them. The addition of color into their lives at their first meeting meant something that they both wanted to ignore. When you’re born, you see the world in black and white. That is, until you meet your soulmate for the first time. From that point on, you get to see the world in all of its colors, until your soulmate dies. When you lose your soulmate, you lose your colors again.

This had to be one of the worst jokes the universe had played on Andrew in a while. The idea that this skittish mess of a boy was supposed to be Andrew’s answer was laughable. Maybe there was some humor involved in this joke after all. Neither Andrew nor Neil planned on ever bringing up the soulmate issue. Ignorance is bliss. If they told no one, if they didn't talk about it, it wasn’t real. Sooner or later the universe would correct itself. 

-

Neil never wanted to bring it up. He knew he shouldn’t have, but he couldn’t ignore it any longer. Being able to see what he had been missing for eighteen years became too much to keep to himself. He was so used to keeping secrets and yet he couldn’t handle keeping this one any longer. He knew he couldn’t tell the rest of the team no matter how much they begged for his trust. So instead, Neil decided to bring it up with the only other person involved in the situation. Neil caught up to Andrew while the team was running laps.

“We need to talk.” Neil started.

“Need and want are two very different things, Neil.” Andrew said.

Neil cursed Andrew for being so difficult, but he went along with it anyway. This discussion may have been what Neil saw as a necessity, but to Andrew it was just another minor inconvenience caused by Neil. 

“Fine, I want to talk to you,” Neil said. Andrew motioned for Neil to go ahead with whatever it was he wanted to say. Neil knew he had to go about this conversation in the same way one would go about approaching a deer, with caution. The second he said something Andrew didn’t like, the conversation would be done. But there was no easy way to talk about this topic. “You see them, right? The colors I mean. The world used to be black and white before you came to Millport and then the next thing I know I’m on the ground looking up at you and everything is completely different. I just need to know, Andrew. I need to know if you see them too.” 

The silence between the two of them was deadly. Neil knew that he had messed up somewhere, but he didn’t care. He had to know that he wasn’t losing it. He didn’t _want_ to know if Andrew was seeing the world in color, he _needed_ to know.

“I want nothing. Remember that.” Andrew said before speeding up to pass Neil. It wasn’t what Neil was expecting. He was expecting nothing more than a stony stare and although it wasn’t much, what Andrew said was enough to confirm that he had been seeing what Neil was seeing. 

The universe’s joke seemed to become even more cruel after Andrew’s confirmation. Neil always knew that he could not be someone’s soulmate. He knew it was possible that he had one, but he knew that he could never truly be that person’s soulmate. He would never be in love. He didn’t have time for love. His mother had constantly drilled into him that love was a distraction and neither of them could afford even one distraction while on the run. Neil’s soulmate was right in front of him and not only was he not allowed to act on it, but he was also to be constantly reminded that his soulmate didn’t want a soulmate. His soulmate didn’t want him. His soulmate wanted nothing. How could the universe make this big of a mistake and more importantly, why did it always seem that these mistakes were at Neil’s expense?

-

“I didn’t think I was a personal problem. You hate me, remember?”

“Every inch of you,” Andrew said. “That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t blow you.”

“You like me.”

“I hate you,” Andrew corrected him.

Neil’s first instinct was to call Andrew out on his lie, but he knew that the one thing that Andrew was not was a liar. None of this made sense and yet, this felt like the last piece of a puzzle falling perfectly into place. Neil had spent so much time waiting for the universe to fix it’s mistake that he never considered that the gift of color might not have been a mistake. None of this should have mattered. Neil wasn’t going to be around long enough for any of this to matter. Neil was not supposed to be anyone’s anything. He had done such a poor job at trying to keep his teammates at arm’s length, which only made him want this more. He was so close to being able to let someone in. He was so close, but he knew he would never be close enough. He couldn’t be anyone’s soulmate, no matter how he felt on the matter. 

-

The lines between enemies and lovers must have gotten blurred somewhere. Neil wasn’t even sure that he and Andrew were friends and yet here he was, making out with him on the roof of Fox Tower. The two had made a habit of coming up to the roof at night. Neil would go to night practice with Kevin and when they returned Kevin would pretend like he didn’t notice that Neil headed up one more flight of stairs instead of going to his dorm. Most nights ended like this, with Andrew kissing Neil until one of them called a stop to it for the night. Other nights ended in comfortable silence. Neil wasn’t stupid. He knew he was almost out of time, the ominous countdown on his phone wouldn’t let him forget, so he chose to spend some of his fleeting time with Andrew every night. Neil had never known touch without the accompaniment of pain. He had never been touched with tenderness. But with Andrew, all of that changed. There was respect between the two of them. Consent would always be key and nothing was done without a definite “yes.” 

None of this would matter in the end. Andrew had said he wasn’t stupid enough to let this thing between him and Neil grow. Neil didn’t have enough time left to waste on imagining how the future would look for them. He had gone into this knowing he didn’t get to have a future. He had gone into this knowing that nothing could ever go further than this for the two of them. So instead of bitterly thinking about the future he would never have, he let Andrew kiss his lips numb night after night. 

-

Andrew didn’t have time to see the elbow coming towards his face. He was too busy making sure he had eyes on everyone who was of importance to him. He could count them on one hand and maybe that’s what distracted him from the incoming attack. Andrew didn’t care about the injury he sustained in the riot, but he did care about what it took away from him. He had been able to see the world in color since the first time he met Neil Josten. He didn’t think that would change so quickly. It seemed that one blow to his eye took away something that had become vital to him. Andrew had always claimed that hoping for colors was a waste of time, but having them all taken away from him that fast was startling. He should’ve ducked, they could’ve blinded him. 

He looked around the bus to take in the damage the riot had caused the rest of the team. Everyone was a bit worse for wear, but they’d survive. What was important was that all of his people were accounted for. There was Nicky in the front of the bus with Renee, and Aaron alone as always. Kevin was at the front of the bus as well. Andrew quickly realized that his people were not all accounted for.

“Neil.” he said in a whisper.

Andrew made his way to the front of the bus and despite everyone’s protests, he exited the bus. Neil was missing and Andrew needed to find him. Andrew _needed_ to find him. The world outside was a colorless blur as he began searching for Neil. He sprinted around Binghamton’s stadium three times before he found something, but that something wasn’t Neil. The object in question was a few fences down from where the Foxes bus was parked. Andrew wondered how he missed the bright orange bag and stick before he remembered that he wasn’t seeing it in bright orange anymore. He was back to seeing the world in black and white. 

“Gone.”

Andrew brought the bag back to the bus and dumped it’s contents on one of the seats. Neil had left behind his phone, along with his exy stick and duffle bag. These weren’t things he would dispose of without a fight. Andrew searched through the discarded phone for some kind of clue and what he found almost made him wish he hadn’t. 

The lone “0” in Neil’s inbox was all the proof Andrew needed. It was proof that Neil hadn’t taken off in fear. It was proof that his things were left behind with purpose. And worst of all, it was proof that Neil Josten was dead. Neil Josten was dead and he took all of the color from Andrew’s life with him. How foolish Andrew had been thinking that a blow to the head could steal something this important from him. How foolish Andrew had been to let someone become this important to him.

In his haste, Andrew had shoved Neil’s racket and bag at Kevin. He wanted to look for more clues within Neil’s belongings. He needed something, anything that could give him an idea of where they would find Neil’s attackers. They had made a mistake in taking something that didn’t belong to them. Andrew might have revoked his protection from Neil, but that didn’t mean he would let someone get away with taking him from where he belonged. When Andrew looked at Kevin he had found the only clue he needed. The guilt Kevin wore on his face was more than enough of a clue for Andrew. Kevin knew where Neil was taken to and Andrew would get the answers he wanted one way or another. 

“Where is he, Kevin?” Andrew asked. Someone who didn’t know Andrew would mistake the quietness of his voice for calmness. Andrew was anything but calm right now. He was silent on the outside, as always, but on the inside he was overflowing with anger. His hands shook with the effort of keeping them glued to his sides. 

“I don-” Kevin started, but the beginning of the lie was all that Andrew needed. He ripped his hands from his sides and reached for Kevin’s throat. He was going to get his answers, even if it meant choking them out of Kevin. It didn’t take long for his teammates and coach to separate him from Kevin’s throat. 

“What the fuck is going on here?” Coach Wymack demanded.

The only response Andrew gave was the glare that he had set on Kevin. The look was easy enough to read, _“Tell me what you know or you won’t live to see tomorrow.”_

“Neil’s not here.” Matt said.

Wymack took a long look around the bus at his team and sighed. Neil was missing. Wymack knew that meant trouble. The question was, who did it mean trouble for? He looked back at Andrew and motioned for him to meet his eyes. 

“You two need to settle whatever you have going on right now. I’m stepping outside to call the hospitals in the area to see if they have Neil.” He said.

Kevin watched Wymack step off the bus before he turned back to Andrew.

“He’s with his father. His father found him and finally took back what was his.” Kevin said.

-

Nathaniel stepped into the shabby hotel room accompanied by Agent Browning. He ignored the looks of horror on the Foxes’ faces as he took in the scene before him. They were all injured in the riot that was staged because of him. His teammates were hurt because of him. He looked around only counting seven foxes and immediately knew who was missing.

“Where’s And-”

The crash that came from behind him signaled Andrew’s violent arrival. Nathaniel quickly noticed the handcuffs that attached Andrew to Wymack. Andrew pushed his way into the room and more importantly, towards Nathaniel. Andrew’s sudden entrance caused Browning to reach for his gun. This then caused Nathaniel to reach for Browning’s arm in an attempt to slow him down and to keep him away from Andrew. He, instead, caused himself an amazing amount of agony. Nathaniel bent down, holding his hands to his stomach in hopes that it would help put out some of the fire raging in them. His pain was interrupted by the feeling of a hand on the back of his neck.

When Andrew had come crashing into the room, he had suspected that all of his colors would come back to him. He blamed their delay on the chaos he had caused in order to get into the hotel room. But even with Nathaniel less than a foot away from him, his world was still devoid of color. Andrew took in the state of the wrecked boy that was in front of him and listened to him speak. 

“They could have blinded you,” Nathaniel said. “All that time fighting and you never learned how to duck?” Andrew did not respond. This was one of the only times he had ever been struck speechless. It wasn’t Nathaniel’s words that left him unable to speak. 

If his world was still colorless, then that had to mean that he was looking at a ghost.

“They’re gone.” Andrew finally said.

Neil began to ask a question, but knew better than to ask what Andrew meant. He knew that his patience were long past wearing thin. It took Nathaniel a slow minute to put the situation together. Gone. Andrew’s colors had been taken from him and Nathaniel was to blame.   
“I’m sorry,” Nathaniel said. He was apologizing for stealing the color from Andrew’s life. He was apologizing for lying about who he was. Nathaniel was apologizing for everything. Andrew pulled his fist back, but he did not swing. It took all of the strength that he had left to resist the urge to swing. Instead, he let his hand go limp.

“Say it again and I will kill you,” he said. 

“This is the last time I’m going to say it to you,” Kurt said, coming up beside Wymack with a dark look on his face. “If you can’t stow that attitude and behave--” 

Nathaniel shot a warning look at him and cut in with, “You’ll what asshole?”

After a brief argument between himself and Browning, Nathaniel turned back to Andrew.

“So the attitude problem wasn’t an act, at least,” Andrew said.

“I was going to tell you,” Nathaniel said.

“Stop lying to me.”

“I’m not lying. I was going to tell you everything. But Andrew,” Nathaniel said. “I think I know why they’re gone.” 

Andrew gazed at Nathaniel. He took this as his cue to explain. Nathaniel switched to German for this part of their conversation. He had a feeling that every secret he had ever kept would be soon be ripped away from him. He was determined to keep this one, at least for now. He owed it to Andrew.

“I’m not who you think I am. The reason your colors are gone is because I’m not Neil,” Nathaniel paused. “They’re going to try to take me away from here. They need me, Nathaniel, to help clear up some of the accusations against my father and to pick out the remainder of his men. They want to put me in the Witness Protection Program to keep me out of harm’s way. I messed up and I know that, but I lied because I thought it would keep all of you safe. But Andrew, if you tell me to leave, I’ll go.”

“You are not Nathaniel, you are Neil Josten and you aren’t going anywhere,” Andrew said switching back to English. He closed his eyes as a shutter racked his body. When Andrew opened his eyes again, Neil was still sitting in front of him, but he was no longer in black and white. The world had come back to life again. Nathaniel was not his soulmate, but Neil was. Bringing Neil Josten back brought the color back to Andrew’s life. “You’re staying with us. If they try to take you away they will lose.”

Andrew’s words did exactly what Neil suspected they would. They lit a fire under the Foxes. They weren’t going to let Neil be taken away from them again. The Foxes fought to keep Neil. Sure, he had spent most of his time at Palmetto feeding them lie after lie, but they managed to build him, the real him, around the lies. He was their teammate and their friend and they were not letting him go again. They would temporarily let him go, with Andrew’s company of course, with the agents. Neil needed to tell the agents everything, only then could he tell his team everything. So they were willing to temporarily let him go because they knew he would come back to them.

-

The last few hours had been nothing if not eventful. The Foxes had won their championship game against the Edgar Allen Ravens. Riko had then tried to take out Neil once and for all only to be stopped, and injured, by Andrew. It was the last mistake Riko was allowed to make. He didn’t live long enough to make another. Neil found his way back to his team after witnessing the bloody scene. It didn’t have any affect on him. Neil’s people were safe and that was all that mattered to him.

His team had, of course, waited for him. They would hear the news of Riko’s death tomorrow. Tonight, they would celebrate what they had so desperately worked towards all year. They were champions. Neil was shaken from his thoughts by the familiar feeling of a hand on the back of his neck. 

“Your close calls are getting old,” Andrew said. “I thought you knew how to run.”

Neil affected confusion. “I thought you told me to stop running.”

“Survival tip: no one likes a smart mouth.”

“Except you,” Neil reminded him.

A year ago, Neil and Andrew’s worlds had still been in black and white. Neither of them had ever hoped, or thought, that they would see the world in color. Now that the world was in color, they could never imagine things going back to black and white. Things were way more complicated than black and white. Neil and Andrew were more complicated than black and white. But that was fine, because they had all the time in the world to figure it out.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! So this is the first fic I've ever posted here! I got the prompt from one of my twitter mutuals and I'm so thankful that they let me use it. I tried to keep some of the original dialogue from the books in this fic to help keep Andrew and Neil more in character because they're so easy to write out of character. Anyway, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
